


Of Drunk Nights, Silly Plans and the Mistakes we Make Along the Way

by SongBirdYesterday



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: (i'm sorry), Alcohol, Alternate Universe - Coffee Shops & Cafés, Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - Non-Magical, Background Jily, Break Up/Make Up, Brief Mention of Abusive Parents, Explicit Language, Get Together, Happy Ending, James Potter Being an Idiot, M/M, Not Beta Read, Severus Snape Bashing, Sirius is struggling a bit to accept his sexuality, especially at the beginning
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-22
Updated: 2020-12-22
Packaged: 2021-03-10 22:53:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 9,373
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28244973
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SongBirdYesterday/pseuds/SongBirdYesterday
Summary: "Ah, so that's what this is about, then? You are trying to find out if I crashed your party." Remus gives a minute shake of his head as if he has just managed to figure Sirius out entirely. Sirius hates people thinking they've got him all figured out."Maybe," he says, and he tries to put as much sincerity in his voice as he can, because he is starting to think that, with Remus, a tad of honesty might work better than putting up a front. "Maybe you just spiked my curiosity for yourself, and now I'd like to get to know you."After James has his heart crushed at a party, he and Sirius come up with a plan to break Lily Evans and her alleged boyfriend apart. However, things start getting a bit more complicated after Sirius finds himself developing feelings for the guy.
Relationships: James Potter/Lily Evans Potter, Sirius Black/Remus Lupin
Comments: 16
Kudos: 117





	Of Drunk Nights, Silly Plans and the Mistakes we Make Along the Way

**Author's Note:**

> This was based on a prompt from @direwolf-summer on Tumblr where they say: 
> 
> "Wake me up when there’s a modern au where James begs Sirius to seduce (and dump) Lily’s claimed boyfriend aka Remus Lupin."
> 
> I'm not a writer, but I was inspired enough by that prompt that I decided to try my hand at it. Please, consider that:
> 
> 1) English is not my first language;  
> 2) I tried, with my very limited knowledge, to use as much British English as I could, but my English is a weird mix of US, UK and, most of all, fanfic, so it probably shows in this;  
> 3) This is unbetaed.
> 
> Still, I hope you like it. Since this is unbetaed, feel free to point out any mistakes/leave suggestions, if you'd like.

* * *

The problem is that James Potter is an idiot. An idiot who claimes to be moved by love and romanticism, but in all truthiness, he is just horny, lonely, and completely gobsmacked in the presence of a beautiful, powerful woman. And drunk. So, so drunk.

It goes like this:

There is a party. It's the beginning of a new term, and even though they have a very full week ahead of them, James and Sirius decide to join forces with their group of friends to throw a party. Since there's no better way to start anything than with a bang, they want to celebrate. And they _do_ mean properly celebrate.

So there's a party. A fucking massive party, loaded on booze and stupid college games that naturally involve _more_ booze. 

There's also Lily Evans. And James, as previously stated, is an idiot, so the moment he lands eyes on her - which sadly to Sirius only happens towards the end of the party when he is totally wasted - he decides that he must charm her. Again _._

Needless to say, it doesn't work. _Again._

When Sirius' attention is finally drawn towards the commotion, it is, in fact, already a commotion, and even though he is almost as hammered as James himself, he is not blinded by love (horniness) for Lily Evans, meaning he has enough sense to know he should do something about the entire situation.

The situation is this:

"C'mon, Evans, you know you want to, I don't know why you keep making yourself so difficult."

You can actually see Evans bristle. 

"I am not _making_ myself anything. I am simply not interested." 

James only leers at that.

"You know, I always had a thing for the fierce ones."

Lily blinks. Sirius wants to grab his friend by the head and shove him beneath the ground. He is by James' side as fast as he can to try and charm their way out of this.

"Evans," He says in his most dazzling smile™. "Forgive my stupid friend here, he's had a bit too much to drink" and here Sirius squeezes James' shoulder probably a touch harder than he should've. "He can't help but make a fool of himself."

Lily just looks at them both as if they were gum stuck in her shoe.

"Clearly. Though I would argue he doesn't need the booze's help to do that." Her expression leaves no doubt that she is just about done with the whole thing. "Take him away now, Black, go deal with him somewhere else." 

She turns her back at them and Sirius is about to do just that, starts pulling James back towards the house, when the twat, the _fucking idiot_ , plants both of his feet firmly on the ground, frowns, and tugs at Lily's arm. The arm whose hand happens to be holding a drink; a drink that is now splattered in the grass, but not, of course, without managing to spill all over Lily's clothes.

"Hey!" Shouts someone who Sirius had failed to notice was there until now. He walks towards them and pushes James away from Lily. "Fuck off, can't you see you've bothered her enough?"

He has light brown hair with messed curls and eyes the colour of honey with specs of green. Sirius tells himself that the only reason his heartrate has suddenly raised is because of the prospect of a fight. It's the only reason. The _only_ one.

Anyway, Sirius doesn't want a fight, not tonight, so he puts himself between the guy and James, lifting his hands up in what he hopes is a placid manner.

"All right, mate, let's just, let's all calm down, ok? I'll take care of him, he's not gonna bother you anymore."

The boy - well, he can't be much younger than Sirius, except he has such a babyface that it's hard not to think of him as a boy -, he looks at Sirius then and Sirius does his best to hold the gaze.

(It's not that hard, given as Sirius can't seem to be able to look away anyway.)

"You better," he spits. "Or else I'm gonna have to take care of him myself."

Sirius isn't one to run from fights. No, in fact, he tends to throw himself at them, but he really doesn't want to fight tonight, and he especially doesn't want to fight this guy _,_ so he is about to apologize and get them both away from there immediately when James decides that it'd be a great moment to speak.

"Now, hold up, who the fuck are you?" He asks with all the air of menace he can muster (which is to say none).

"My boyfriend, Potter." Lily responds defiantly, lacing her fingers with the guy. "Now go away."

Lily Evans is not their friend, exactly, but they do know her, they do have friends in common - hence why she is at their party - which is why it comes as complete news that she has a boyfriend. James seems shocked beyond himself, but that is all the distraction Sirius needs to finally snatch him away from there.

"Right, so there is that, then." He says, grabbing James by the arm and walking away as fast as possible without it seeming like they're running. "Have a lovely evening, Evans, and, you know, congratulations to the happy couple or whatever."

He manages to get James inside the house, spluttering and hurt, but thankfully without causing any more damages. For tonight, that is.

******

The next day finds Sirius in an intense stare contest with the ceiling of their house (the Potter's, actually, but also James', also his), nursing a damn headache that is partly because he is hungover, but at least 50% because of James Fucking Potter.

"A boyfriend! A boyfriend that comes out of nowhere!" 

He's been repeating variations of the sentence for the last ten minutes, and if Sirius knows him well (he does), it's also because he doesn't want to focus on the part where he was a rightful pratt to Evans last night, too embarrassed by that, choosing to focus instead on the other thing at hand, which is the news that she is no longer single.

"At least it's not Snape." Sirius mumbles.

"Don't even go there!" 

"Look, mate." He sits up and looks straight at James, trying to convey the importance of what he is about to say. He fucking _hates_ taking on the role of the mature one, and it doesn't have to happen very often, thankfully, but every now and then James has his head so far up his own arse that Sirius has no other choice than to shake some sense into him. "You were an idiot last night. I don't know what got into you, but the truth is, she wasn't interested before, and she certainly isn't interested after that. And now there's this boyfriend. It's time to let it go."

For one blissful second, Sirius thinks James might actually listen to him. He has the look of someone so ashamed and regretful that it can only mean he is reconsidering every decision he's ever made in his life.

Then everything crumbles with just one word.

"Or..." James looks at him, his expression changing at once to one of pure brilliance, aside from the slightly manic smile. He looks as one would imagine bloody Newton looked like when he was pondering about gravity, so of course, that is how Sirius has absolute certainty that the next words leaving his mouth are going to be complete rubbish. 

"Or you could seduce him!"

His headache now is definitely at least 75% due to James Potter.

"Seduce... Who?" And it is truly a wonder how much incredulity Sirius manages to express through two simple words.

"The boyfriend, of course!"

_Of course_.

"James-"

"No, listen!"

"No, you listen! They are dating! D-A-T-I-N-G. She called him his boyfriend, which means he is committed to her, which means he is not going to be seduced by anyone other than her!"

"You don't know that!"

"And that is without even considering the fact that he's dating a woman, and last I checked, I was still very male, thank you."

"Just because he is dating a woman doesn't mean he is straight, c'mon, you of all people should know that!"

"Says the straightest guy I know."

"Arguably." 

"Arguably." He agrees, a smile on his face, because it is an ongoing joke between them that James must be the gayest straight guy to ever grace the world. "Still, you have no ground to believe this could work, not to mention it would devastate the poor girl."

"Exactly!" James almost shouts. "And then guess who is gonna be there by her side, comforting her, and more importantly, managing to erase the bad impression I made last night?! And all the other nights. And afternoons. And- You get the idea."

When Sirius still doesn't say anything, he adds "Oh, get off it, it's not like they've been together forever! Until last week she was shouting to anyone who had ears about how single she was!"

Well, she did do that, but not exactly the way one would believe by hearing James' words. She'd been having some sort of discussion with Snivellus that neither Sirius nor James knew much about besides the part where she shouted at the greasy bastard, probably out of frustration, that she didn't have to give him or anyone satisfaction about anything in her life, because she was _very much single, whether you like that or not, Severus!_

"They can't have been together for more than a week." James finishes his line of thought.

To be honest, Sirius doesn't much care about Evans' feelings. And James is his best friend, his brother, the person who has done everything for him and more. They are partners in crime, so he can't just deny him that, right?

The fact that he is truly considering this has nothing to do with the butterflies Sirius felt last night when looking at soft curls and hazel eyes.

"People don't even know I like guys." He says because he feels like he should at least put up some resistance, but also because it's true, he is not out yet, only James knows of his... _occasional enjoyment_ of other men. 

James huffs.

"I'm not asking you to go around showing off the guy, I'm asking you to seduce him. You can even dump him afterwards if you want. Unless you've suddenly developed massive voyeuristic tendencies, I don't see how that should be a problem."

"Not that you'd know any about it." Sirius smirks.

"And I'd rather be kept in blissful ignorance, thanks much."

Sirius sighs. 

"Fine, I'll try."

"Really?" The maniacal grin is back and his eyes are slightly unnerving, but in all honesty, there isn't much Sirius would refuse James.

He claps his friend on the back. 

"Really."

And that is the beginning of his doom.

******

It is Monday lunchtime when Sirius decides to check out the café just outside campus. He doesn't usually eat there on Mondays, but today he has specific cravings for their special sandwich and strong black coffee. It is just his luck that the barista has curly brown hair and eyes the colour of honey with specs of green. He gives a quick look around the place, but nope, it seems there's no Lily Evans on sight. _Very lucky indeed_.

"Hello," he practically purrs, his voice all velvety and soft. "You're the guy from the party." He refrains himself from saying 'Evans' boyfriend' because he doesn't want that little fact at the front of the boy's mind right now.

The guy - _Remus,_ his name tag reads - quirks an eyebrow and seems greatly unimpressed.

"You were the drunk dude failing at keeping his even drunker friend in check." It's not a question, and yeah, ok, that means that Sirius must work on his second impression now, but it also means that Remus knows exactly who he is.

"Sirius." He introduces himself, offering his hand. Remus slowly raises his own hand and shakes Sirius', suspicion written all over his face. He doesn't say his name back, but not a problem, Sirius can read just fine, and has, in fact, already committed the boy's unusual name to memory.

"So, Remus, I've never seen you here."

Left brow still raised, Remus seems to ponder for a minute whether that deserves an answer or not. It's obvious by his hesitance that he doesn't understand why Sirius is still here talking to him, nor does he understand where this is going. Thankfully (for Sirius) he decides to go for it.

"I only work on Mondays and nightshifts."

"Weird choices for workhours."

It must be the wrong thing to say, though, for the smile Remus gives him at that is not genuine at all. It's the kind of smile someone gives "a Karen" when she demands to speak to the manager after she's just been told the soy milk is over and she won't be getting her decaf soy latte.

"Well, I also have to manage my uni hours, besides having to work for a living, so there is that. Now, would you like to keep interrogating me about my personal life or are you ready to place your order?" And _hoho, would you look at that?_ The boy has a sharp tongue! All through that, he is still smiling _The Karen Smile_ , and it looks absolutely angelic in that pretty, boyish face.

Sirius grins, unable to hide his mirth, and proceeds to order his meal.

He decides to leave Remus be for now. He has enough trust in himself to know things will get where he wants them to be, eventually, and that little interaction has only shown him just how much he wants it, not only for James but also for himself. So he enjoys his meal and starts planning his next steps.

******

Sirius comes back the next day. He doesn't know when Remus' night shifts start, but he hopes that 6:30 pm - after his last class of the day - might be late enough that the boy would already have clocked in. 

He is once again in luck.

"Hello." He says just as luringly as last time. Remus lifts his head up from the till and recognizes him in a second.

"Just a sec, officer," he gives it a pause, letting Sirius simmer in a moment of confusion before adding "Let me finish here, and then you can take me to the interrogation room, pick up from where you left yesterday." And the boy has the audacity _to wink!_

Sirius can't help the barking laugh that leaves his mouth. To his immense delight, he can see that Remus' lips quirk up at the corners as well.

"Well, you can't blame a bloke for being curious, can you? I'd never seen you before, and then boom, there you are, in the middle of my party."

"Ah, so that's what this is about, then? You are trying to find out if I crashed your party." Remus gives a minute shake of his head as if he has just managed to figure Sirius out entirely. Sirius _hates_ people thinking they've got him all figured out.

"Maybe," he says, and he tries to put as much sincerity in his voice as he can, because he is starting to think that, with Remus, a tad of honesty might work better than putting up a front. "Maybe you just spiked my curiosity for yourself, and now I'd like to get to know you."

Sirius revels in the look of surprise that flickers through Remus' face. The boy did no see that coming. 

_See? You can't just assume you know me._

"Why would you want that? We talked for, what? Three seconds? And it wasn't even a pleasant interaction." The way Remus says it, as if he is challenging Sirius to contradict him, does delicious things to Sirius' insides.

"Well, we also managed to talk for a whole of two minutes yesterday."

And there is the sceptical quirk of that left eyebrow again. Sirius gives out a small breath of laughter.

"It wasn't pleasant from my side, or rather, from James' side, but you were just being a good..." He cuts himself before he can say the word 'boyfriend', cursing inside for not planning that phrase ahead. "Companion", he settles with.

Hoping to compensate for his slip up and make sure to send Lily Evans to the furthest corner of Remus' mind, Sirius resorts to one of his most effective seduction techniques: he gives Remus a once over, head to toe and then back again, pins his eyes (grey, they do tend to work in his favour) intently on Remus' hazel ones and smirks. It must have worked somewhat because he can see the boy's throat move as he swallows thickly, and _isn't that good news_ , for it seems that Remus might not be so straight after all.

The boy's nose scrunches up once the words register and Sirius tries to tell himself that it isn't cute. It isn't, because "cute" is not a word Sirius Black uses.

"I wasn't exactly nice." Remus deems of it.

"I'm not exactly a nice person." Sirius shrugs. "Can't really complain there, or it'd be the pot calling the kettle black and all that."

Remus gives a small chuckle, looks down to his feet, and then up to Sirius again. And shit if that smile doesn't scream _snog me senseless_.

"It can't be much of a problem for you. I mean, with a house that big, you probably just have to pull out your wallet and the people you offended will begin licking your boots faster than you can say 'daddy's credit card'."

That sends Sirius reeling.

"What?" He spits with more venom than he even intended, forgetting all about his seduction plan. He has been working very hard to rid himself of any resemblance with his parent's ways, something that sadly, infuriatingly, doesn't come to him so easily as it should, and to have an assumption like that made about him by someone who doesn't even know him, based on, what? Going to a party at some posh house? Oh, it makes his blood boil.

Remus' eyes, though, grow to the size of saucers and he manages in seconds to pull the most innocent look Sirius has ever seen on anyone.

"Oh, I'm sorry, that was so inconsiderate of me. Of course, you'd probably just send your butler to handle the peasants."

He is _teasing_.

If there wasn't something about this boy, something that seems to have been crafted with the exclusive purpose of alluring Sirius to him, he would probably have flicked him off by now (or worse, probably worse) and walked away; but as it is, Sirius _is_ lured to the man, feels something pulling him towards Remus just like the tides being pulled by the moon.

So he laughs, loudly, unexpectedly. Because _who the fuck_ is brave enough to say shit like that to a complete stranger?

"Fuck off," he says, but it's all in good faith. "It's not that big of a house."

"It's a bloody mansion." Remus' innocent look melts away, giving space to a genuine grin.

"It's not even mine. It's James', or, actually James' parents. The two of us live in a flat near campus. A normal-sized one, before you go getting any ideas."

Remus hums, still smiling.

"James is the drunk idiot invading people's personal spaces, I gather."

"He is not usually that much of an idiot." Sirius shrugs. "He was just really drunk."

"And horny." 

"Yeah, that too." He chuckles. Still, because he feels compelled to defend his mate, Sirius adds "He's actually a good guy."

Remus gives him a sceptical look.

"If it wasn't for him being so emphatic in his attempts to woo Lily, I'd think the two of you are more than just good friends, for how you talk about him."

"Oh, God, no. Ew, no, absolutely not." Sirius honestly can't hide his complete disgust over the idea of being romantically involved with James, and it evokes a sincere laugh from Remus. "We're brothers, that's all."

"Quite the loyal brother you must be, then." Before Sirius can come up with some sort of comeback, not ready for their little interaction to be over yet, Remus points towards one of the barstools and adds "Well, since you seem so intent on disturbing me in my workplace, you may as well sit here. Tell me what you want, I'll grab your order and you can try and convince me you're not having a scandalous affair with your alleged brother, _rich boy_."

It goes smoothly from there. Remus starts opening up more, and he only ever uses his dry wits for both of their amusement rather than to keep Sirius at arms' length. Sirius, for his part, comes back to the coffee shop almost every day. He wraps Remus up in long conversations that often result in even longer waiting lines, neither of them realising it until someone behind Sirius calls them out on it. Lily Evans never comes up in any of these conversations.

It is about two weeks later when Sirius finally asks Remus out. He is afraid that if he takes too long, the easy banter they have will be taken to as simply being friends, and so he decides to make his move. After a brief moment of shock (a moment during which Sirius isn't jealous, he doesn't _care_ if Remus is sparing his _girlfriend_ a thought), Remus actually accepts, and Sirius doesn't quite manage to contain his own surprise at that. Seducing Remus is proving to be way easier than he'd ever thought. Either that or the boy is just really, really dense. Fortunately, Remus takes his brief astonishment as a sign of insecurity, doing nothing more than offering that adorable smile he has for when Sirius does something he finds particularly endearing.

On a Wednesday, they have lunch together. Sirius eats another sandwich and Remus delights himself with two slices of pizza. After a long walk around the nearby park, they decide to get some ice cream. As Remus licks his chocolate ice cream cone (Sirius is beyond the point where he pretends no to be affected by the words "Remus" and "licking" existing in any context together), he talks about his classes, about how much he admires his Literary Theory and Criticism' Professor, how inspiring he can be, and how he hopes to be able to teach like him one day; he talks about how much he dislikes his Creative Writing's Professor, how dull he is and how much his classes lack in didactics, but most of all, how he fears to be like him one day; Remus talks about dealing with University and work, bills and life while being knees deep in a major and living alone in a big city, how he struggles and how he learns to cope.

Sirius talks about being sixteen and homeless, though he doesn't talk about the why and Remus doesn't press; he talks about following James into Law School because he follows James everywhere, but regretting it immensely and then having to switch majors; he talks about feeling lost and struggling to find a sense of belonging somewhere, how he has begun to find himself in Mechanical Engineering, but also how heavily stereotyped it is, and how he doesn't feel comfortable coming out amidst that; he talks about how he has never felt comfortable coming out to anyone other than James.

Remus kisses him then. It's sudden and soft, just a touch of lips, but it is enough to leave Sirius completely gobsmacked. It's only the two of them inside the ice cream parlour, aside from the people working, that is, and anyway, they are in a secluded enough space that Sirius can wipe that look of uncertainty right off of Remus' face with another kiss. Only this time, the kiss is deeper and lasts longer, allowing Sirius to taste the ice cream on Remus' tongue. Chocolate has never tasted better.

******

"It's working, then?" James asks one afternoon. Sirius is idly sprawled in a settee at their uni's common room, where they like to lounge about between classes or, like now, when they just can't be arsed about going home yet. He is grinning like an idiot at Remus' latest text and quickly tries to cover it with a frown. It doesn't work.

"What is?" he asks instead, faking innocence. James arches one eyebrow.

"Your charity campaign to help stray dogs." he slaps Sirius in the head. "The fucking plan, what else? Has he dumped her yet?"

Sirius huffs, uncomfortable with that topic of conversation.

"I don't know."

"You don't know? You've been dating for a month and you don't know?"

"We've only been going out for three weeks, alright? Before that was just, you know, preparing the ground. And besides, we don't talk about Evans."

Both of James' eyebrows shoot up at that.

"What, like, never? She has never come up?"

Unfortunately, the lack of response is already a response on itself.

"I can't believe it! The guy is cheating on her with you and he doesn't even tell you?" He seems to ponder this for a moment before continuing "Then again, I suppose that if he is already cheating, I shouldn't be so surprised about his lack of honesty."

"Well, there's the thing. He doesn't strike to me as someone who would do that."

Sirius has already spent a great amount of time thinking about this and he always gets stuck on Remus' possible motivations. He is sweet and probably the nicest person Sirius has ever known, meaning it would be extremely out of character for him to be cheating. The only possible reason he has to believe Remus would do something like that would _maybe_ be if he was confused about his sexuality and/or truly, truly lost inside a relationship he didn't really want to be a part of in the first place. Only, whenever they talked about the topic of sexuality, Remus actually seemed pretty comfortable with it, not sharing any of Sirius' awkwardness or his reluctance at using some words. Sometimes, in fact, Sirius even got the impression that Remus was giving him a very specific look, a look full of kindness and patience that says "I know what you're going through, I've been there already and can tell you everything will be alright". So Sirius truly has no reason to believe Remus would be cheating on someone.

Thinking that sharing his thoughts with James could maybe offer him some perspective, Sirius prepares himself to really get into it. As soon as he gets the words out, however, a lengthy "I know that was what we planned, but I can't think of a reason why Remus would be cheating on Evans", there is a loud snort behind them. Both Sirius and James turn their heads to find none other than the man, the impersonation of a pile of grease himself, Severus Snape.

"Lost something, Snivellus?" James asks.

"Nah, he probably just can't find it, seeing as he can't see past his huge nose." Sirius joins in.

Snape scowls.

"Remarkable. Your offences just keep getting funnier after the fiftieth time you use it."

"Well, if you're so tired of our fond ways, what are you still doing here then?" James puts out.

"When I hear such tremendous imbecility as the ones leaving your mouths just now, I can't help but be shocked into place. You know, making sure my brain hasn't melted in the face of such stupidity."

"If your brain melted, it wouldn't be because of _our_ stupidity, you can be sure of that."

"Charming, Black." Snape rolls his eyes.

"Oy, stop lurking about and listen to people's conversations, this is none of your business! Carry on now, c'mon, chop-chop." James claps and waves his hands as if shooing an annoying animal. When Snape doesn't show any signs of moving, he adds "At least try not to be such a creep, Snape." 

Both Sirius and James stare at him until he huffs, readjusts the strap of his bag, and starts going in another direction. Sirius doesn't need any other reminder that such a public space may not the best place to have this conversation.

"C'mon," He tells James as he gets up from the settee. "Let's go back to the flat, we can talk there."

******

After five weeks of knowing Remus, three of which they've been officially seeing each other, Sirius has made a habit of showing up unannounced on Remus' job. He likes to surprise him, likes to see the glitter in his eyes and the bright smile he has that tell Sirius that he wasn't expected but is certainly welcomed. It's a look he is so fond of that he can't be blamed for not having eyes for anything else around him. 

Today is one of these days Sirius decides to show up unexpectedly, except today James is with him. He had insisted on coming when Sirius had mentioned visiting Remus, undoubtedly hoping to get any kind of information whatsoever in Evans' relationship status. Talking with James the other day hadn't brought any light over Remus' possible motivations, so Sirius suspects that, to James, this can help somehow to see where Remus-and-Lily stand as a couple. As annoyed as Sirius had been, he hadn't managed to brush his friend off, no matter how much he tried (hard, he tried very hard). 

So there they are, at Remus' work, Sirius completely entranced by the look on Remus' face and James trailing right behind him.

"You're here!" Remus greets him, his lips curving softly around a smile. Sirius intends to stare for exactly five more seconds before coming up with something to say, but he is only on the mark of three seconds when Remus continues speaking.

"This is kind of perfect, actually, because I was rather hoping I'd get to introduce you two soon." 

He is still grinning, but Sirius can't help but utter a confused "Huh?". Remus extends his arm to some point at Sirius' right and that's when Sirius realizes for the first time since setting foot on this shop on this godforsaken day that there's bright red hair right to where Remus is pointing.

"Sirius," he says. "This is Lily. Lily, this is Sirius."

At the back of his mind, Sirius manages to notice that James has frozen by his left, and also that he looks just like a deer staring at headlights, the exact same way he does whenever he knows things are fucked. And Sirius, he can't for his life imagine a reason why Remus would want to introduce him to his girlfriend of all people, but as he slowly turns his head to see Lily Fucking Evans right by his side, of one thing he is certain: this can only be a sure sign that things _are_ fucked.

"I realize that you technically know each other, but still, I think I should, you know, probably introduce you. Officially, I mean." Remus is still talking like there's nothing unusual happening, and just add it to the pile of things blowing Sirius' mind right now. "Not that I'm saying we are official! I- I'm not, I don't want to assume, you don't have to worry, it's just, you know, Lily is so important to me, and- and..." he stops mid-sentence, looking flustered and embarrassed and Sirius would be distracted over how adorable it is if it weren't for the fact that _Remus is introducing him to his goddamned girlfriend._

Lily is just looking at Sirius with an air of confusion because it's been a minute already and Sirius hasn't said anything, hasn't even moved, and James is still frozen right next to him, and, _oh, I don't know,_ probably because she is _his fucking girlfriend!_

"Are you ok?" Remus says timidly. "I know we haven't talked about it, but it doesn't have to mean anything if your not ready to- if you're not ready. You don't have to freak out. Are you freaking out? Please don't freak out." He says the last part in such a fragile voice that Sirius has no other option but to break whatever spell he is under and look at him. Remus is looking down now, his hands nervously twisting his apron. He looks crestfallen, and _oh, no, no, no,_ Sirius just can't have that.

He reaches out on top of the counter, touches Remus' wrist softly and asks "Can we talk somewhere?"

Remus looks at him and then down again. "Yeah." He says sadly. "Come with me."

He doesn't look at Sirius again as they both walk towards the door at the back and into another room. It must be where the staff takes their breaks because there are random things all over the place. There's a round, big table in the middle of the room with a pack of cigarettes on top and four wooden chairs around it. There are some hooks filled with coats on the wall by the far end of the room, near another door that - Sirius assumes - can only lead to outside. The visuals are complete with a computer on top of a very fragile looking desk at the east corner, near the entrance from where they came from, and a few discarded cups here and there.

They both get inside and Remus closes the door behind him.

"I'm so sorry." He says quickly, though he still won't look at Sirius. "We didn't talk about it, and I know that you've only told James about yourself, but I promise Lily is not going to tell anyone, she is not even gonna care, it's just, she's such a big part of my life, I couldn't _not_ tell her about you."

"Hey," Sirius tries to get his attention, but Remus seems determined to keep looking at his shoes, so he puts two fingers beneath Remus' chin and lifts his head up. "Hey, look at me, c'mon. I'm not mad. I'm just surprised."

Remus closes his eyes and heaves a long sigh before opening them up again.

"I know I should've warned you, but I didn't know you were coming today, and she had dropped by for a tea earlier and was still around. She already knew about you from what I had told her, so it just seemed the perfect opportunity, is all."

"Well, to be fair, I'd still be surprised if you had given me a heads up. I mean, I would never have thought you'd want to introduce me to your girlfriend."

In a matter of seconds, Remus' features are rearranged towards utter confusion.

"What?"

Sirius doesn't understand why suddenly Remus is looking at him as if _he_ was the crazy one.

"You know, Lily Evans."

"Right..."

"Your girlfriend."

"See, that's the part I'm confused about. She certainly is a girl, and she is definitely my friend, but where did you ever get the idea- Oh, wait." Remus says, realization suddenly dawning on him. "Is this because of the party? It is, isn't it?" And now he is cackling up, wiping off actual tears from his eyes from laughing so hard. Sirius is lost trying to find the humour in the whole situation and can only wait until Remus has calmed down enough to speak and let him in on the joke. "Sirius, I'm gay! I thought that was ridiculously clear from the moment I first set eyes on you, but apparently not. She only said that at the party to get James to stop bothering her. Christ, have you spent this whole time thinking she and I were dating?"

He still smiling and even Sirius must admit that the situation is frankly ridiculous. He and James had sprung up this whole thing and it was all because of some shitty excuse to stop James from being such a dickhead. But more importantly (and the part Sirius is choosing to focus on right now), Remus isn't dating Evans! Remus is _single_ , which means that maybe Sirius could have him all for himself, no obstacles in the way, no girlfriends preventing him from further commitment, no-

"Wait, if you thought Lily and I were dating, then why did you still ask me out?"

Oh.

_Shit._

Sirius is quietly reassessing every single decision he's ever made in his life that has brought him to this exact moment, hoping, wishing with everything he has, truly begging every force on the universe so that he can come up with an acceptable excuse that can get him out of this mess when, suddenly, there is noise coming from outside. It seems to be quite a commotion, with shouting and everything, though it's not clear enough that they can pick up on specific words. Remus tries to ignore it and is still looking at Sirius, making it painfully obvious that he's expecting an answer right at this moment, thank you very much, but the noises continue and seem to get even louder. Remus has no other option than to see what is happening. He is, after all, still on shift.

When they get outside, there seem to be three people fighting as the few other patrons at the café are watching. James and Lily are two out of the three people, but surprisingly, they are not fighting each other. On the other end of the fight is Severus Snape.

"Severus, I already told you, that's none of your business." Lily is telling him. She seems to be more tired than angry, but that doesn't discourage Snape.

"It is my business when I see you are walking with the wrong kind of people!"

"I am not interested in hearing who you think 'the wrong kind of people' is! Please, just go away."

"You heard her, walk away now, Snivellus." 

Snape scoffs.

"Oh, please, Potter. As if you could lecture anyone on that. Everyone knows how much you pester her, even though she is constantly telling you to leave her alone. Oh, not only that, but now it would seem that you are also making up plans and schemes about her, isn't that right?"

"What is that even supposed to mean?" Lily asks suspiciously, glancing between Snape and James.

"I heard him, Lily! He and Black planning something with Lupin, something about cheating. They are clearly trying to deceive you!"

Snape is being extremely vague, but it's still enough to make all of Sirius' blood leave his face at once. It doesn't take much to put two and two together, and Remus is an intelligent bloke, his mind is most certainly already adding their conversation in the backroom to what Snape is saying now. By this point, he has probably reached a conclusion that is fairly close to the truth.

The three of them are still discussing, James throwing some offences at Snape, Lily stating that she doesn't need Snape to "take care of her". Remus marches up to them, distinctly fed up with the whole situation, his expression hard in a way Sirius hadn't even thought possible in such an angelic face.

"That's enough. You are disturbing the clients, now please leave." His voice isn't loud, but it is firm.

"As if you had the balls to-" Snape starts but is soon cut by the other men.

"I am not going to repeat myself, Snape. Leave. Now." And there truly is something feral in his features, something not even Snape can contest, it seems, because with a brief moment of hesitation, the git gives a last pleading look at Lily and, when he sees how she ignores it completely, he lowers his head and goes for the exit.

Everything is quiet for a few seconds, and then Remus turns to Sirius.

"You too."

"Wait, Remus-"

"You thought we" he points towards Lily and then himself "were dating, and still came after me. I asked you-"

"Remus."

"No, I asked you 'why would you want that?', and what did you say? Hm?"

Sirius doesn't, can't answer.

" _You_ said ' _maybe you just spiked my curiosity_ '. You said ' _now I'd like to get to know you_ '." He is furious, every word leaving his mouth only fuelling him up more. "You made it all seem like some sort of romantic shit that only happens in the corniest of movies, and I actually believed you! I did, I believed you, like the fucking idiot that I am. _Oh, poor rich boy,_ struggling to find his identity, maybe he needs help, maybe I can be a friend, maybe he is interested in something more!" He is almost shouting now, making Sirius recoil. "And all that just to, what? Get Lily away from me, her alleged boyfriend?! To get your dickhead friend into her pants?!" 

Remus isn't calming down so they can have a proper conversation about it, and Sirius is painfully aware of everyone still staring at them. 

"Remus, please, let's go back to the back room, we can discuss it properly-"

"I don't have anything else to discuss with you." He sounds tired, all his fire leaving him at once. It hurts. Sirius would much prefer it if he was still being shouted at.

"If I could just explain-" He tries again.

"I don't want to hear it, Sirius, you can save it." Remus' lips curl disdainfully towards a sneer "Maybe you'll get to use it on the next victim of yours and James' plan. Now leave, please, both of you."

Sirius wants to contest it, he really, truly does. Only there's something in his chest that tightens just by the thought of adding any sort of distress to this boy right now. Remus' features are still hard, but his eyes, his beautiful hazel eyes are dull, none of the previous shine they held whenever he looked at Sirius. There's only bitter disappointment. Sirius has a lot of experience at being other people's disappointment, but it has never hit him so hard as it has now.

He swallows around his suddenly dry throat, nods once, and walks towards the exit. He stops a moment to look behind him, but Remus has his back turned to him and somehow that only makes it hurts more. He turns around and leaves the shop, James following after a beat or two.

******

Sirius is in his room. He is lying in his bed, smoking. It's been two days since his doom day, and he hasn't tried to reach out to Remus, as he feels like there's nothing he could say that would help. As usual, he screwed things up to the point of no return. 

Remus hasn't tried to reach out either. Sirius doesn't expect him to.

There's a soft knock on his door. James doesn't wait for a response before getting in. He lies down beside Sirius on the bed and takes a deep breath before speaking.

"I'm sorry." He says, and it sounds startlingly sincere.

It is not often that either James or Sirius apologise to anyone, and it's probably even rarer that they apologise to each other. They understand one another so well that usually a simple joke and a light punch in the shoulder is enough of a peace offer, so, naturally, James' proper apology catches Sirius off guard.

"What in hell for?" He asks, truly surprised. 

"Well, you know. I thought it was just an innocent plan, a joke that wouldn't get anyone into trouble, but I think it's quite safe to assume now that this wasn't the case. So I'm sorry for putting you up to this."

Sirius puffs, quickly dismissing him.

"Oh, please. It's not your fault. I went into this willingly."

James is quiet for a few seconds. Sirius knows he is trying to build the courage to say something else - he can practically see the way the man is planning his next words.

"You like him. The bloke, Remus. Somewhere down the line, you started fancying him."

There's nothing to add to that, so they just stay there in silence.

"Or..." James keeps going, his brows knitted together in thought. "Or you actually fancied him even before all this started."

When Sirius still says nothing, he lets out a soft "oh".

"You should tell him."

Sirius scoffs because, although he has spent the last two days thinking about every single thing he wants to say to him, the idea of Remus even considering hearing that right now is so unlikely. He says as much.

"It's the opposite, I think." James retorts. "I think that's exactly what he needs to hear from you. From what he said back at the café, I'd say he believes this whole thing was just a plot that had nothing to do with his own feelings. Well, I suppose that is true from my side of the bargain, but I can see now that it has never been that way for you, has it?"

Sirius takes a breath or two before answering. "I think part of the reason I agreed to do it in the first place was that I'd have an excuse to go after him."

James hums.

"Who would've thought. Sirius Black, of all people, a romantic."

"I'm not some hopeless dimwit blinded by love," _Yet._ "I still don't think you can fall for someone you just met." Sirius rolls his eyes, both to James' insufferable romanticism crusade and to himself. Even if it's true and he still doesn't think love is something that just happens to you out of nowhere, still thinks that it is something that requires work and dedication, he does understand James and his terrible infatuation over Evans a bit more now. "The first time I saw him, yeah, I thought he was fit, but it was only in those last few weeks of getting to properly know him that I-" He cuts himself off, scowling once he sees the shit-eating grin on James' face.

"See? A romantic." He rolls his 'R's like the complete berk he is. It takes all of Sirius self-restraint not to punch him.

"Get up." James says as he proceeds to do just that.

"Got nowhere to be."

"Oh, you absolutely do. We're gonna drive to that charming little café so you can tell Remus all of that yourself."

Sirius hesitates, biting his lower lip.

"You think he'll hear me out?"

"Only one way to find out."

******

James parks his car across from the shop and they can see through the windows that it's almost empty. It's late enough that Sirius deems it worth just wait until Remus closes instead of interrupting yet another one of his shifts. Besides, he doesn't want Remus to have the pretext of having work to do just to avoid talking to him. When they see the last customer leave, Sirius gets out of the car and towards the café. He has to jog a little in order to catch up to Remus before he can lock the place, and he manages that just fine, but once Remus sees him on the other side of the glass, he scowls and aggressively turns the sign from 'open' to 'closed'.

Bad luck for the guy, though, for Sirius can be very stubborn when he sets his mind to it, and he has his mind set on Remus, alright. He simply ignores the sign and Remus' scowl and walks into the shop wearing determination like a suit.

"I know you don't want to talk to me right now, and you don't have to, but will you please, just listen?" He rushes to say. Remus glare possibly gets worse at that, but hey, at least he hasn't asked Sirius to leave.

"Listen," He starts. "I'm not a good person. I'm spoiled and immature and I don't much care for other people's feelings."

"Great start." Remus remarks dryly.

"Let me finish, ok?" Sirius runs a hand through his hair, tries to recompose himself, opens his mouth again. "I'm a prick, I'm too self-absorbed, I don't think ahead, I have been told on multiple occasions and in very colourful ways that I'm not good enough... So I know that I'm not a good person. That's exactly why I don't trust myself with big decisions, because _I know_ that I tend not to see past the end of my own nose. And when we started this whole thing, ok, I'll admit, it was one of these moments. James wanted to break you and Evans apart, and I just went for it. I didn't care about her feelings, and fuck, I didn't even stop to consider _your_ feelings in all that... Now I realize just how selfish that was, that I didn't give a moments thought that, even if you were her boyfriend, I'd have placed you in a very difficult position. I just figured 'hey, it's either a no or a let's go from him, so what I got to lose, right?'" He takes a big breath before he can continue.

"The thing is, I didn't stop to do that because, when James came up to me and asked me to go along with his stupid plan, all I could think was 'great, I'll get a chance to chat the fit bloke up'. But then I got to meet you, to really meet you. I got to laugh at your sarcastic comments, to be amazed by your courage to say so much shit directly to my face when you barely even knew me! But... But more than that... I got to see the way your eyes crinkle when you smile, the way you scrunch up your nose when you're trying to come up with a way to compromise with someone - because you do that, you compromise, you try to find a middle ground for both you and the other person just to make things more comfortable for them. I got to see you open up for me, how smart and caring and daring and just bloody amazing you are. It really got to me, all this. You really got to me. I wasn't even expecting, fuck, I wasn't even planning on, on opening up that much, to you or to anyone else, but you-" He runs a hand through his face, frustrated that he can't find the right things to say. "Shit, I'm not good with words."

"You, Remus Lupin, make me see things in a way no one else ever did. You make me want to be kinder, smarter, more considerate, just like you, because you don't deserve a shithead of a boyfriend, you deserve the very best. You make me want to do better, to be better, Remus. You make me want to scream from the rooftops that I get to hold your hand and kiss your lips and do romantic shit that ' _only happens in the corniest of movies_ '... You make me want to scream to the world that I am queer and that for the first time in my life I'm able to forget everything my bigoted parents have ever said to me and be truly, truly proud of that."

Remus is only staring at him with his lips slightly parted. Sirius doesn't know what that means, doesn't know if he's crossed a line and is about to get socked on, only knows that he's come this far, he may as well continue.

"I know the whole thing was stupid and inconsiderate and that I should've cared about that since the beginning. But you can't think that what we had during this time was all a lie or some sort of scheme just because of James' plan to get Evans to give him the time of the day. For me, it was real. Everything I told you, everything we had... It was all real. And I'm sorry that I screw everything up so badly."

There is a long pause where neither of them says anything. They are standing in an empty café late at night, the world outside still buzzing with the noise from the street and people walking by. Remus is looking at him with astonishment, and his features have gone a bit softer throughout Sirius' speech, but there's also uncertainty and Sirius doesn't know what to make of that. He is getting more uncomfortable by the minute and is seriously considering just taking whatever is left from his shattered pride and walking away when Remus finally, _finally_ speaks.

"I can't be your moral compass, Sirius."

Sirius lowers his head, ashamed.

"I know. I know I need to work on that, and in a whole other lot of things, to be honest, but... It's not the only reason I want you, Remus." He forces himself to look straight at those hazel eyes, endure the fire they bore into his very soul. "In the short span of time I've got to be with you, you made more of an impact on me than you even realize. This is not me trying to put the responsibility in your hands, I'm not trying to get a mentor who can help me in the crossroads of life... I'm trying to tell you that you mean a lot to me, that you made me realize I want to be a better person- for you, yes, and for James and for other people I care about, but also for myself. Because I can't keep screwing things up the way I've been doing my entire life."

Remus nods lightly, apparently reaching some conclusion.

"Ok." He says.

"Ok?"

"Ok. Let's give this another try."

Sirius almost can't contain his smile on his face.

"But we'll take it slowly. I need to know if you're serious about everything you said, I can't just jump on it again."

"That's fair. I can do that."

"And you do need to work on your shit, Sirius, I can't be the one telling you all the time whether you should do something or not, whether you're being inconsiderate or, or..."

"I know. You won't be."

"And you can't be that inconsiderate with me ever again."

"Remus, I know. I understand your hesitance, and you're absolutely right. We'll take it slow and, well, I can't promise you that I'm going to be a completely different person when the morning comes, but I can promise you that I'll try, and I'll keep trying until I don't have to try anymore."

Remus smiles and it's like the whole sun is rising just for Sirius to watch, bathing him in light and illuminating that small shop in a small corner of the world.

"That's all I ask."

It goes like this:

They take it slow, just like they agreed they would. It starts with a few dates a week until they feel more comfortable taking things further. Sirius does try; he tries every single day in his life. He doesn't always get it right, still makes a lot of mistakes, but Remus isn't there to breathe down his neck and pick at his every misstep so he can punish him. They are partners above all else, which means they respect each other and help each other, lift each other up and encourage one another to do better. To be better.

At some point, Lily starts warming up to James. Sirius knows that James apologized to both her and Remus, but he still doesn't know what exactly made Lily give him a chance, because James refuses to give him any detail. It doesn't happen at once, of course; it's only a good amount of time after Sirius and Remus started officially dating that she asks him out. Remus is surprised. Sirius - who knows James better than anyone and knows just how incredible he can be when he is not trying to put on a show - isn't, not really.

It's not perfect, for life in itself is not perfect; yet it is more than Sirius could've imagined to ever get. They've got each other, they are happy and they still have the span of a lifetime to enjoy together. Sirius vows to himself every day to do nothing less than his best with this second chance he got.

**Author's Note:**

> I'm sorry to all the Karen's out there, I meant no offence.
> 
> Thank you for reading. Kudos and comments are more than welcomed, if you want to leave them.
> 
> I’m not very active there, but if you want to chat, you can find me on tumblr @[such-goodluck](https://such-goodluck.tumblr.com/)


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